Behind every great man is a great woman. This phrase is really not an exaggeration.
“The King’s Speech” -which I believe will be the best movie this year- puts a spotlight on a piece of history involving the British royal family. What’s very penetrating to me is how this one family brings to mind a very important aspect of men-women relations which I call feminine magnetism and what it does to a man.
First, the Queen’s mother is the embodiment of the very thing I’m talking about. She was such a powerful woman, such a rock to her husband…and to the nation during the war crisis.
Second, Wallis Simpson -the woman the Queen’s Mum incidentally (or not) loathed- is but another example of how powerful a woman can be. She was the reason Edward VIII abdicated his throne. What more poignant example is there to show than the one in which a man leaves behind a position of power/high status for a woman he loves and can’t live without?
Third, Prince Charles was so in love with the ordinary looking Camille Parker Bowles and chose her over his beautiful wife, Diana.
Fourth, Kate Middleton -Prince William’s fiancée- is a young woman with irresistible self-confidence. She radiates this aura “You’re lucky to have me as your woman” about his Prince fiancé and to be honest, I do feel that she holds such power over him: that he might not be this lucky again if he loses her -yet again- (they broke up once and 6 weeks later he had to take her back because he couldn’t stand seeing her having such a great time being approached by other great men).
He might be the future king but the real ruler is really her. Just watch.
To get to this place of power there is one thing a woman should realize that our strength is not in our “equality” to or our ability to compete with men. Our power lies in our softness and subtle ways of influencing them behind the scene. A man by default craves feminine softness and the kind of closeness and intimacy only a woman can give. Once he’s hooked, he’s not going anywhere. That is how powerful we are.
The problem with most relationships is something that starts so sublime and passionate, rapidly begins its downhill slide due to lost feminine-masculine polarity and ignorance of both camps about what each other needs at the most primal level. Couples who start being so adoring of each other remain in a loveless -and sexless- relationship in which what they need to do is merely tolerating each other.
Our miscommunication in relationships boils down to one thing and one thing only: we don’t know that we’re dealing with a different species. Women think their partners are hairy women while men think we are emotionally indulgent men. If we are aware of the fact that we are so night-and-day different (see the yin-yang symbol as an exact reference), we will be much more forgiving and don’t have the unrealistic expectations that our partners will act/think/respond the way we do.
Because men don’t have their sensitivity chips wired the way ours are, it takes a lot of patience -and frustration- to live with one without the manual.
Learn more about the power of feminine magnetism and what men really think/want from a woman here.
This article is one of the breakup series I write. Please check my author page for more articles on the subject or join me in my ex-back support group and relationship forum for more tips on how to deal with your breakup and how to get yourself on the path of getting your love and your life back. Please also follow me on Facebook for my daily nuggets of reflections/insights/advice and tips on attracting and maintaining a lasting relationship and fixing a broken one.
Katharina Phang is an author, love/life coach specializing on reuniting couples and curing troubled relationship. She is finishing her 4th book, a self-help book/memoir on her experience of dealing with breakup and how to get on the reconciliation path. She founds a free ex-back support group and relationship forum [http://gettheloveyoudeserve.info].
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