You might think the title of this article alludes to the fact that a larger woman might require a physically strong man in order to handle her ample charms, but you would be quite wrong.
In our popular culture, the media worships the beautiful, perfectly made-up, perfectly-coiffed, perfectly-dressed, THIN woman! Our current standard of beauty is based on super models, actresses, musical artists, reality TV stars, all for the most part very thin women. With the overwhelming amount of these images bombarding us every day, the message seems clear: women who do not fit this standard of beauty are unattractive, unloveable, and unacceptable.
All BBWs have at one time or another felt the pressure of trying to conform to this ideal. Fad diets, excessive exercising, diuretics, and questionable diet products are just some of the things we have tried in an attempt to “fit in”. Even women who would not be considered BBWs feel this pressure. Girls as young as five or six have been known to worry about their weight or the size of their thighs. The number of people suffering from conditions such as anorexia and bulimia have reached new heights.
So, with all the pressure on women to be thin, what does that pressure do to single men who are looking for partners? I believe it takes a special man to date BBWs. One with enough confidence to overcome the pressure put on men to date “acceptable” women.
A man who prefers BBWs may find his buddies, and even family members and coworkers, critical of his choice of women and may ridicule him for it. It takes great strength of character for a man to be able to stand up to his peers. Even strangers may take it upon themselves to voice their disapproval of his choice of women.
BBWs are known to be sweet, warm, giving, and very loving. However, because many have also been hurt more than once, they can also wear a protective armor that must be peeled away before their true, wonderful selves are revealed. It requires a man with self-confidence, one who doesn’t take rejection too seriously to pierce this armor.
BBWs may also be very suspicious of a man’s attraction to her. Many BBWs have been targeted by predatory men who view them as “easy” pickups for casual sex. A serious man must be able to voice his admiration and make his good intentions clear. Persistence is key, but not always easy. It requires a man who is used to fighting for what he wants.
When it comes to the physical side of loving BBWs, it doesn’t require a particularly strong man. It does require him to be open-minded, easy-going, have a good sense of humor, and a willingness to experiment. Pre-conceived notions of what constitutes good sex should be thrown out the window in favor of finding what works for two particular people.
Janice Elaine is the organizer and moderator of an active plus-size social group in the Frederick, MD area called Frederick Plus Size Connections.
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