The dating scene for mature women who love women over 40 can be quite a challenging escapade to say the least. If I didn’t know any better I would think we have become an endangered species. What happened to the plenty of fish concept? Have older lesbians been abducted by aliens? You can find a few of us occasionally showing up in the one allocated lesbian bar in a few states.
We have meet-up groups but many are frequented by a younger crowd. There is an occasional woman’s dance for the more seasoned gals and a few lesbian speed dating, face to face events. I encourage women to just show up as much as they can . The more you make an effort to go out, the more chances you have for making friends and getting dates.
So when opportunity knocks and it is time for a date here are a few tips that can help make for successful dating and relationships and a more joyful experience.
1. Look your best
Put on the outfit that reflects your style and makes you look your best. When you look fabulous you feel fabulous. And a fabulous feeling person feels confident which is a great attraction quality. And while we are mentioning confidence. If you wear “odor de desperation and insecurity”, your date will leave running way before you get to any dessert. If confidence is a challenge, it is a good time in your life to strengthen that part of yourself. Not only will it make dating more successful but all areas of your life.
2. Be considerate
That means arrive on time. Being late is a bad way to leave a good impression. It is rude and makes the other person feel they are not important enough for your time. Put away, hide, bury or discard cell phones. What could be more rude and obnoxious than arriving late, is talking on your phone when your date is sitting there waiting to spend her time with you. Peoples time has as much value as your time. If you want to have a date with your cell phone make that at another time. And don’t be condescending if you feel this is not the right person for you. Treat your date with respect whether there is an attraction or not.
3. Pick a good meeting place
Meet in a place that is conducive to conversation and easy to travel to for both of you. If it is a restaurant make sure there is food appropriate for both of you. Having a date in a disco is quite counterproductive. A restaurant, or cafe or outside at a park where you can relax without having to yell to be heard are some suggestions.
4. Have an attitude of fun
Some women approach lesbian dating as a traumatic life and death situation. One of the most appreciated and attractive qualities is sense of humor. Lighten up. It doesn’t mean you have to crack jokes but be open to spontaneity and making light of the situation. Instead of feeling as if dating is equal to going to the dentist for root canal, feel as if you are going to Disney World or as if you just won a million dollars. Think fun thoughts and remember meeting people and relationships are always learning experiences. Enjoy that perspective.
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